Chapter 1
‘I want Jeremy!’ I scream.
This is not right! Wrong place, wrong time and wrong people, not to mention the plum sofa I am currently giving birth on has seen better days!
So here I am, Caroline Lawson, imminent mother to be. Maternity tent covering my bump and hands laden with two bulging carrier bags full of babygros, soft toys and a whole variety of things I’ve been told I simply have to have, but, at the same time have no idea about what they actually do. Today is three weeks until ‘drop day’ as my fiancé Jeremy keeps calling, and my first day of maternity leave.
All the books I’ve read have told me I need to be prepared as baby could decide to make his entrance at any time – yes his! I am still getting used to the idea that fairly soon I am going to be outnumbered 2-1. We’ve agreed on the name Ryan after many ‘discussions.’ Currently I am strolling around Smartbaby Boutique admiring the expensive, but ultra cute outfits dotted around the store. An appliquéd lion here and a jolly green dinosaur there. Grace is throwing me a baby shower next week so she has asked me to come up with some ideas for gifts. Despite telling her this really isn’t necessary she has proven to be insistent – so here I am. I make a few mental notes, particularly liking a tiny little blue number with cows lovingly sewn on. I have moved towards the entrance now, and then I notice a gorgeous quilt, it has cute little dinosaurs all over it. According to the information beside the cot there is a whole range including curtains, ;amp shades and small framed pictures. We haven’t really decided on a nursery theme yet and I’m not confident enough to buy it without Jeremy’s agreement, not to mention the cost at the end of the price tag which is enough to make my eyes water.
An eager shop assistant has noticed my lingering looks and is making her way towards me.
‘Beautiful isn’t it?’ she gushes.
I nod in agreement.
‘Boy?’ she asks indicating my rather obtrusive bump. I nod again even though I feel the question isn’t strictly necessary.
‘Well if you’d like to place an order I can have it here for you in a couple of days, I can even get it delivered to your home and assembled, for a small extra cost.’ She adds helpfully.
‘Oh, I need to show my fiancé first and my friend is in the middle of organising a baby shower -I’m banned from buying too much.’ I stutter as I become acutely aware of the bulging carrier bags from SuperMum by my side! Even so the assistant senses that she has lost this battle and offers me a catalogue, taking care to show me the page where the dinosaur range can be found. I mutter my thanks and make my escape. I’m keen to have a sit down. My feet are hurting and my back is niggly – not surprising I suppose when you have an extra person on board hitching a lift.
I visit the nearby coffee shop and order a decaf, relieved to see a squashy seat free by the window. This means I can people watch and pretend I’m not actually completely exhausted by simple every day activities. I waddle over and half place – half drop my carrier bags and then carefully settle myself into the chair. I sink in and sigh but I know I may struggle to get back up again. Whilst I am sitting I check my phone – no messages from work -good – an e-mail from Grace reminding me to put my feet up while I can and a text from Katy, Alfie’s wife asking if I need anything. I shoot off a quick reply to Katy assuring her that if I need her or get bored I’ll let her know immediately. Jeremy is working right up until the birth so he can have some time with us both afterwards so I am not surprised there are no messages from him. He is probably busy delivering papers to lots of chambers, answering calls and arranging appointments for the barristers in his chambers. Not to mention he is studying for exams and attending interviews so he take on an enhanced role with a pay packet to match.
I sip my coffee looking at the passers by – young girls on study leave swanning about in skimpy outfits taking advantage of the early June sunshine. Mothers dragging reluctant toddlers away from the bakers window and the toy shop opposite the coffee shop. I smile and rub my bump as I imagine myself as the Mother trying to persuade my own little monster that they have had enough to eat and there are plenty of toys at home to play with. I can’t help wondering how I’ll cope when the baby becomes bigger and starts walking and talking. I will have to rely on my legal reasoning skills I suppose as judging from the negotiations going on outside the window these toddlers are skilled in this area.
Coffee cup drained I begin the complicated procedure of regaining my feet. First I shuffle forwards to the edge of the seat, then one arm behind me I kind of heave myself in an upwards direction. My back is arched so I don’t fall forwards. That’s it, I’m up, slight knee bend, reach to the side to retrieve my shopping bags and off I wobble.
My final stop of the day is Babeez world! A cheaper version of Smartbaby Boutique and much busier. This shop always reminds me of my shoplifting client Timmy Simons. It is large and just about everything you could ever want for your baby, tolled and pre-school children can be found in this place. Instead of the sedate atmosphere and sense of space created by Smartbaby, Babeez World is crammed full of kids, usually racing around pressing buttons, screaming and making me wonder what on earth I am doing! There are plenty of people browsing, kids clambering about on the outdoor play equipment even though there are signs warning them that it is dangerous to do so. To add to the confusion the tannoy seems to be going off constantly.
*Bing bong*Could a member of staff please come to the delivery door. *Bing Boing* Call for Joyce on Line 3. *Bing Bong* Manager to checkouts please!
No wonder I think as I glance over and notice a heated discussion taking place between a woman waving an item of clothing about and a red-faced assistant. I have come here to try and make a decision about a pram! Jeremy wants a travel system so that we can get Ryan into cars easily. I have pointed out to him that it won’t fix to his scooter, nor will it help me when out an about on the tube. I admire one of the in vogue style perambulators , but no car seat is included and it is definitely not tube practical. I am reluctant to play around with them too much as they all have wires attached linking them to a rather loud alarm system as I discovered about a month ago when we first tried to make this decision. We were put off by my Mother telling us it was bad luck to buy a pram too early and that when we did buy it we should have it sent to her house until we needed it!
